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Let's get personal, shall we?

8/24/2012

28 Comments

 
Be Personal & Friendly When Blogging Genealogy
© Copyright 2012 Caroline M. Pointer
Be Personal and Friendly When Blogging Genealogy
There's a lot of buzz online right now {mainly marketing buzz} about how important it is to be personal.

Especially on our blogs. And I wholeheartedly agree.

However, it's not a new concept. Far from it. Some salespeople learn rather quickly {At least the successful ones who stick around for the long haul} being personal with their current customers and their potential customers yields better results.

But why is that?



Because humans are personal. We have always been personal.

"Good morning, Mrs. Atchafalaya! How are you today? Arthritis gettin' any better?"

"Did you hear about the flood just 2 parishes away, Remy? Landsakes, my brother-in-law - you remember him from my Gran's wake, right? Justin? Well, Justin said they'd like to never get outta there with everything they own."

"Hi! You must be new. Haven't seen you here before. My name is Adele. Welcome."


It's human nature to find a common ground with other folks and to be personal with them.

Our ancestors did it. And we do it too ~ at least in real life we do.

But are we getting personal online? On our social networks? Are we doing it on our blogs? How about in the comments section on our blogs?

You know, the comments section of our blog where people take the time out of their busy day in their busy life to comment on what we write? Yeah. That place. I recently commented on a fairly popular blogger's recent blog post. And while the blogger responded, they didn't use my name and they didn't thank me for stopping by. 

And their response was a bit condescending when my comment agreed with what they said in their blog post. {Have *no* idea where that came from. And if I had written something meant to be controversial, I would've expected a controversial response. I'm a big girl. I can handle it.}

Needless to say, since this isn't the first time I've received this particular response from this blogger, I won't comment again on one of their blog posts nor will I promote any of their blog posts. {Why would I? I mean, who else is being treated that way by them? I don't want to send traffic to a place that's not friendly.}

Besides in the comment section of a blog post, another easy way on a blog to get personal is to start with our name. Or rather, end with our name. 

That's right.

End each and every blog post with our first name. And it doesn't matter if we're blogging because we're a cousin hunter, because we're representing a genealogical society, or because we're representing a genealogy related business.

In fact, it's even more important to be personal if we're blogging for a genealogical society or a genealogy related business.

People don't join groups. They like to join where people gather.

People don't do business with people they don't know.

They do business ~ whether that 'business' is cousin hunting, membership growing, or sales ~ with a face and a name. With a person.

And they like to get personal and friendly. Are you allowing them to do so?

Let's get personal, shall we?

~Caroline 
28 Comments
Cindy
8/24/2012 03:36:42 am

Caroline,
You hit the nail on the head. Thanks for the reminder. Cindy

Reply
Thomas MacEntee link
8/24/2012 05:05:27 am

Exactly. I think that technology can sometimes be blamed for a lack of the "personal touch" but it isn't a barrier - it is just a different medium that we need to adapt to our needs to reach out. Thanks for a great post!

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Jana Last link
8/24/2012 05:31:44 am

Great points Caroline!

I'm usually pretty good at addressing the person by name when they make a comment on my blog, and thanking them for stopping by.

But I have to say I don't end my blog posts with my name. Ooops! Hmm, I'll have to fix that.

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Kenneth Marks link
8/24/2012 05:43:50 am

Caroline,

What we write about people is a direct reflection about our feelings towards people in general. If we don't care about people it comes out in our writing and our speaking. Blogging is just another way to express our voice - what technology we use to express it doesn't matter.

The danger is that, especially in comments, that we are somehow anonymous. That is what technology has allowed us to do. And that anonymity allows people to write negative stuff that they would never say to the persons' face that they are writing to.

So, excellent points Caroline.

-Kenneth

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Jenny Lanctot link
8/24/2012 06:47:24 am

Well said, Caroline! (And I shuddered when I read your post because I thought "oh no! was that me?" and then I realized you said POPULAR blogger. Whew. Close one). Anyway - Like Jana, I always try to respond to my blog comments in a personal way, although I also don't end my blog posts with my name (guess I'll be adding that to my template). I also try to write my blog posts as if I'm chatting with a friend who is actually interested in genealogy :) I'll be darned if I'm going to let technology take away my personality!

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Kathy link
8/24/2012 07:00:54 am

Add me to the list of people you've made think today. I don't add my name at the end of my posts either. And jumping into blogging was a bit scary for me. Not sure if I wanted to be seen by too many people. Not sure how much to reveal about myself. Not quite sure what to say to commenters, but I always say something. I'm learning and getting more comfortable as the weeks go by.

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Kathryn Lake Hogan link
8/24/2012 08:51:05 am

Greetings Caroline,
I think as a society we have become less friendly and less personal than our ancestors.
You have some good ideas here, Caroline. I think I may try some of them on my own blog.
~ Kathryn

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Emily Garber link
8/24/2012 03:27:45 pm

Caroline:
Spot-on post. I was recently thinking about two relatively popular bloggers who did not respond at all when I (and others) posted comments on their posts. As a result, while I still read what they have to say, I will not take the time to post comments on those blogs again. Frankly, I'm thrilled when anyone comments on my posts - it happens too infrequently(!) - and I always respond. Common courtesy.

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4YourFamilyStory
8/24/2012 07:01:13 pm

Thanks Cindy. It's not always easy 'to hit the nail on the head' with a blog post. {In fact, it's a lot harder than what people think. LOL.}

And thanks for reading, Cindy. I appreciate it! :)

~C

Reply
4YourFamilyStory
8/24/2012 07:07:54 pm

Exactly, Thomas. Technology is a tool to help us accomplish our tasks, but we should be in control of it.

Thanks for stopping by, Thomas, and for commenting. :)

~C

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4YourFamilyStory
8/24/2012 07:10:43 pm

LOL, Jana. I've read your blog, and it's definitely friendly. Just think, though, if you end with your name, people will be more likely to remember who has that friendly blog they like to read so much.

As always, Jana, it is a pleasure having you stop by and reading. :)

~C

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Jana Last link
8/25/2012 05:09:34 am

Aw, I'm honored that you've read my blog Caroline! Thanks!

Oh, and my signature? Done! Added it to today's blog post!

Jana

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4YourFamilyStory
8/24/2012 07:17:34 pm

Indeed, Kenneth. And people *are* busy. It's a heady thing to me to know that not only did someone like what I wrote, but what I wrote moved them enough to respond.

With their own thoughts, words, and ideas. Amidst everything they have to do. Wow.

And we all need to remember that.

Thanks for coming by and reading. I really appreciate the support. :)

~C

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4YourFamilyStory
8/24/2012 07:27:39 pm

Jenny,

LOL. I don't believe that person reads this blog. But I could be wrong.

And, as you've probably read, I write my blog posts in the same manner as you ~ like we're sitting down for a cup of coffee {and a piece of cherry pie because there are no calories or fat in my blogosphere} and we're just talking about this and about that.

And technology is what allows us to do this with people all over the world. It breaks down those barriers.

And I like to think many of our ancestors would be quite enamored with today's technology. It enables world-wide discussions about the comings and goings of *them* ~ our ancestors. I've got to think a few of them would be impressed.

Anywho. Thanks for stopping by and joining the conversation. :)

~C

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4YourFamilyStory
8/24/2012 07:34:39 pm

Kathy, it's okay. I've been there. When you start out you wonder, "Ohmigosh, will they like this?" a lot. On the first week of writing on my personal family history blog, Family Stories, I didn't sign my name.

But then sometime in the middle of the next week, I did it for the first time naturally. What I had written just called for my name at the end.

Kinda like a letter.

And letters are very personal. And so are our stories about our ancestors and family.

If you're not comfortable now about it, give it some time. Perhaps, when the time is write, it will come naturally.

~C

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4YourFamilyStory
8/24/2012 07:37:40 pm

And, Kathy? None of us are perfect. I signed off on my reply without saying thank you for stopping by! LOL.

I appreciate you reading and commenting on my blog post today. :)

~C

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4YourFamilyStory
8/24/2012 07:43:35 pm

Kathryn,

I agree with you, and it's a shame people are losing the art.

Because being personal and making people feel comfortable *is* an art.

However, I think if people stop to really think about it, it kind of boils down to the Golden Rule.

Treat others the way you want to be treated.

Stop, smile, and make someone feel good today.

And using their name, your name, and telling others you appreciate them makes everyone feel good.

And thank *you*, Kathryn, for stopping by and joining the conversation. It wouldn't have been the same without you. :)

~C

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4YourFamilyStory
8/24/2012 07:49:36 pm

Emily,

And we should all be thrilled when someone takes the time to respond to the words we've put our hearts and souls into.

We put a part of ourselves into those words and ideas. And it's powerful and meaningful when those words and ideas spark someone else to respond in kind.

It's humbling.

And it's good manners to recognize it.

And I'm humbled and thankful you stopped by and joined the conversation, Emily.

~C

Reply
Laura Cosgrove Lorenzana link
8/24/2012 11:12:26 pm

Caroline,

*I* was worried, like most bloggers starting out, about who would want to read what I'm writing. As I retooled and edited my first post, I realized that I didn't want to write; I wanted to TALK. (Anyone who knows me IRL is sitting there right now vigorously shaking their head up and down) I'm always so happy when people comment on my posts. Most importantly, when new people comment, I check who they are and go to THEIR blog (if they have one) or FB, Twitter, etc. and follow them; so it's also a way to gain a wider audience (community building).

I have to admit that I don't read nearly as many blogs as I'd like; probably only 10 or so a day. But, I do my best to always leave a comment, even if it's just a 'hey, great post!'. At least then the blogger knows they're being heard.

~ Laura

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Caroline M. Pointer
8/26/2012 03:21:41 pm

Laura, you just have to start. You know? We do our best to follow whatever rules we know of, but at *some* point, you just have to write and learn along the way.

It's much like life. If we waited for perfection, we'd never get out of bed, much less leave the house and *live*.

And? You are absolutely correct about turning around and reading our readers/commenter's blogs! People tend to forget that blogs are social networks. And *that* is how it's done, Laura! =) Good for you.

Thank you so much, Laura, for stopping by and commenting. I really appreciate it. =)

~C

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Rob Gumlaw link
8/25/2012 03:17:16 am

You make readers feel comfortable right away by selecting great pictures of food. I am 'hungry' for more before I've even read the first paragraph.

I think trying to write for your audience is important. Blogging should be conversational, not thesis writing.

Thanks "Sweet" Caroline.

Rob

Reply
Caroline M. Pointer
8/26/2012 03:31:45 pm

LOL, Rob. That's a picture from two crawfish boils ago. And that pic makes me hungry too. I'm glad you like it. I've started just taking my own stock photos for my blogs. {Mainly because I'm addicted to my iPhone camera and all the photo editing apps.} And it makes it easier for sourcing.

However, I couldn't think of a good pic to take for this blog post, but I had {for random fun} used the name Atchafalaya which made me think of this pic from a crawfish boil I had attended. So I replaced a tornado with a flood; changed county to parish; and used Cajun-French names for the other examples. And voila. I made you hungry. LOL. {And that's how my crazy mind works.}

And agreed. Conversational works best for blogging. When we get too thesis-like for a family history audience, then we aren't writing to the correct audience.

And then our blog explodes. Just kidding. It doesn't explode, but implodes.

I thank you so much for stopping by and reading, Rob. I think this is the first time you've commented on this blog, but ~if I'm not mistaken~ you've commented on 4YourFamilyStory.com, and I thank you for spending time on my sites and interacting. I both enjoy and appreciate it. =)

~C

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Mariann Regan link
8/25/2012 06:38:04 am

Dear Caroline,
Your observations are full of insights. They really started me thinking and then made me think some more. Thank you for blogging on this subject! The whole effort of "getting personal" can become joyful or hazardous or both. Some people try not to slight other people or adopt the wrong tone--and maybe others don't even try, they're careless, or they just want to "toot their own horn." Or maybe trying and not trying can be the same person on different days! Interpersonal relationships can become so fraught so quickly, it can be exhausting, even when you can look at the person and get visual clues. And we're all trying to get personal by using just words and images--concrete "material," not fluid moment-to-moment interaction. Thank you for alerting us to some pitfalls. Twitter and blogs do need to be personal. Otherwise they're "preachy" or worse--I'll see blogs, incl. mine, in a new light now.

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Caroline M. Pointer
8/26/2012 03:37:53 pm

Mariann, I agree getting personal online can be tricky. But I'll also add that it can be just as tricky in person. At some point we just have to do and trust and hope for the best. That doesn't mean that everything will work perfectly. Far from it. Life isn't like that ~ offline or online.

I want to encourage folks, though, to do it. To be personal on their blogs. It's effective and will help with your blogging genealogy goals.

And, Mariann, as always, I thank you so much for joining the conversation. I always look forward to your insights and our conversations, and I always come away from them learning something new. And I appreciate that and you. =)

~C

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pauleen link
9/1/2012 12:05:53 pm

Thanks for a great post Caroline..you've ctainly generated a lot of discussion nd reflection. I'm always disappointed with blogs where the writer doesn't respond..it's a bit like talking to yourself. I am haphazard in using name though "always" address a new commenter by name, where it's obvious. like others I sometimes forget my own so will be lifting my game!

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4YourFamilyStory
9/3/2012 01:34:06 am

Thanks, Pauleen! Sometimes it's just the little things that can make a visitor feel welcome on your blog.

Thanks for stopping by & reading! :)

~C

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Tomasz link
10/9/2012 10:52:08 pm

Hi Caroline! Thank you for this wonderful post! Your tips are valid not only for blogs but universally true. I do believe that it is important to get personal when communicating with other people. Finding a common ground creates attraction and a feeling of understanding, and this opens the doors to effective communication. And being friendly to other people often creates a similar response. The more we give the more we get.
Tom

Reply
Caroline Pointer
10/18/2012 03:55:28 am

I couldn't agree with you more, Tomas. Language is communication. And communicating with others is the goal when blogging about family stories and our research.

Thanks for reading!

~C

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